i generally feel dat in every day life,we find many such things that upset us,many things we dont like.how should one cope vd such situations? i get disturbed at small issues related to managment.how to keep urself calm and deal wd unexpectd things and unwanted events?


Answers


bella
743 days ago
Hi - very good question. Was wondering why you use the words "us and we"? How does your anger come out negatively? There's some people who have very explosive anger and this needs professional therapy. Having a positive outlet for stress is good - like exercising, writing down thoughts, punching pillows or a punching bag. Slow deep breathing and learning simple meditation also helps a great deal. Remembering that anger is the other person controlling you helps.

Another tip is learning how to be assertive and knowing when to react. This means filtering out what's necessary to react to, with problem solving or letting things go when you don't have control over the outcome. Its also great to reel in the after affects of stress - often when someone is upset, this has a ripple affect....meaning someone stresses you out and then you're short tempered with the next people you come in contact with. This affects personal interactions - like the husband who's had a bad day, brings home his anger to his wife and kids. If the self help methods don't help, then anger management counseling and problem solving would be a good thing to do. Best of luck.



Endeavy
743 days ago
Bella your answer has also helped me and for years now I have filled pages with my anger / frustration because I get angry with myself so it is a realease .I wish I could get angry with people that deserve it but I am in DBT and have hope that 1 day I might be able to control my anger ,I also find screaming really loud in a big open quiet space or into a pillow helps me .

Thanks for posting .



bella
743 days ago
You're welcome and thanks for the reply. I was going to suggest screaming in an open field or into pillows....I've suggested the pillow idea before. I'd like to try the open field and think that would be a better release, since pillows kind of symbolize 'stifling' the anger. I bet it would feel great to scream freely like that :) Best of luck with your therapy.



lamar1480
743 days ago
Try taking anger management



londongirl678
742 days ago
You try going to the doctor the anger management sessions? Or possibly when you feel angry/upset over something, try and think if you are really that angry, or if it's just overwhelming.



izzy40
742 days ago
I suppose assertiveness classes could help(ideas about how to express your feelings in a calm, controlled way). Also meditation or yoga is another idea. Ask yourself if things that upset/anger are important or will it change the situation/make it better by feeling these things? Think what ways you can positively change the situation.



sadinvegas
715 days ago
I have found that writing down exactly how I feel and why is helpful with my anger. I also find its better to write down what I want to say when I am angry with someone before I say anything since I can edit what I write but can't take back what I say



eveh1
680 days ago
meditate or take slow deep breaths until you calm down and occupy yourself with stuff so you won't remember what made you angry.Try taking anger management as well.