Avatar Posted by dmcreative 83 days ago (Question)
I don't feel like myself lately. a couple of weeks back, I had an intensely bad trip on mushrooms and followed up by some nights of drinking. About on the third night I started to feel very strange. Almost out of body. Like I was watching life unroll around me but had no control over my own. My heart races and I always wonder "Why do I feel like this?!" I feel disconnected from myself. I look in the mirror and it seems like I'm not even staring at me. I feel like a robot at work, mechanically taking orders and serving customers while it feels like it's not me doing it. I don't know what's wrong, but I looked it up and to me it's starting to sound alot like depersonalization/derealization. I'm going into senior year in highschool and I've always had good grades, good looks, I'm popular. I have experimented with drugs. And there have been some troubling times in the near past; relationship with girl ending after she cheated on me, brother being kicked out and then coming back home 4 days later, aunt diagnosed with cancer, haven't seen my dad in a year.
I want to know how to get back to feeling like me again and not worrying about all this any longer. I sometimes can't even connect to humour because it feels unreal. I hate this feeling and just want to be happy again.


Answers

Written by Edahn 83 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I've also experimented with drugs. Anytime I did hard drugs, I'd have to get a LOT of rest afterwards. Alcohol actually tends to disturb sleeping quality. With all the other stuff going on in your life, I think you need to get some good quality sleep. And on top of all of that, self-consciousness and anxiety can further make you "detach."

Forget about drinking and go into "detox mode" for the next 2 to 3 weeks. Cut out caffeine, alcohol, and drugs and make sure you get plenty of sleep. If you need to nap, go ahead and nap.

In the meantime, I'd recommend you choose "introverted" activities like reading about philosophy, writing, listening to music, maybe a little contemplation, and if you're into art at all, this would be a good time to explore it in any form -- drawing, painting, music, calligraphy. If you have a chance to have a good conversation with someone, seize it.

Don't worry so much about your internal state -- whether you feel connected or not. Leave that question aside for now the next 3 weeks. You won't SUDDENLY pop back into feeling normal, but you will gradually. The shift probably won't even be noticeable for a while.

If you're feeling good after 3 weeks, go back into your routine or keep the new routine you've adopted. If you notice things have gotten A LOT WORSE (which I don't think they will), go visit a therapist.

Written by Clyde 78 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I think a lot of this is due to your drug use. Please stop as soon as possible and go to the doctor! You are risking your health...your heart is racing because of the drugs.

Best,

Clyde


Log in to answer or register here.