Posted by whiterabbit20063 212 days ago (Question)
What do you do when you think you might have a personality disorder? I went to see my campus counselor for depression and anxiety months ago and she told me to go to the clinic to get myself checked up for. But the problem is that i still havent. i havent really had the time and most times, i dont even feel like riding to the clinic its like i have mild agoraphobia im too scared to be seen or something even to ride a bus to the clinic, or think the clinic will judge me. i think everyone is going to judge me i think like this its so strange i feel like its trial and jury and im the person on trial. i havent been doing well in school it was anew campus i thought i could do well but then i started to really feel like i was having anxiety attacks in classroom so i ended up just not going, for the crowds of students in calss would make me feel like i was nervously shaving seconds off my life or just so nervous in class i'd turn into a clam or shell. i just dont know how to feel comfortable. was doing good in class until i started missing class, havent been turning in my assignments for class i told my teacher I would start to but then im starting to miss class again, and work is making me suffer, i don't feel part of my team at work i dont really think they like me, for some reason I always feel alittle detached but really i want to feel part of the team. my hours have been cut, i cant pay my bills on time so ive had to borrow money i feel very shameful and guilty now i keep digging myself a deeper hole i want to get out. sometimes i feel like i keep setting myself up for this but i dont really know how to get out. i feel like i dont really know myself either. who can i identify with? who am i really inside? i am so confused with my life right now. why do i feel not motivated to go to school? who am i? why is it that i keep failing or something, in school and work?
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