I'm an ex drug user. My anxiety is the reason i used and i'm currently dealing with an elevated level of anxiety. My mind goes over things constantly, and my body reacts. My head says 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441, 4114, 1441, 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441, 1441, 4114, 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441. While this is happening my body jerks in a pre predicted pattern and wont stop until I go over the pattern perfectly in my head. Sometimes its while i'm driving or talking and I can't respond or move on to the next thing until i'm completely finished. If this makes any sense to you please let me know what to do. I'm 31 and I have been dealing with this for about 25 years. I'm extremely embarrased to see a doctor and I'm sure that once my drug use is out in the open I will be shunned away as all drug addicts are. Please help me. Thanks.