Avatar Posted by jayna01 214 days ago (Question)
I seem to be able to get jobs, and then for some reason I lose them or get fired. I don't know if it is just me or my meds? Sometime I feel trapped and just want to run out of my job and never come back.


Answers

Written by Edahn 213 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I have trouble maintaining jobs and I don't have bipolar. :) Maybe it's not a bipolar thing at all.

Written by yoshigirl 213 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I am bipolar, and while I can't say that I don't keep jobs, (I hav been working in the same place for years) I can relate. For me it manifestsin the form of lack of success within my job/career. I don't lose jobs/get fired, but never get promoted either. When I am manic I do an amazing job and am very productive, but when I am depressive, I underperform (relatively at least...ie. the work is satisfactory...but not mind blowing or promotion material.Sometimes it's even downright crappy.) This is not an unusual thing for people like ourselves. Coupled with the high rates of very low self esteem amongst us, we rarely ask for things (or if we're feeling rather grandiose, we ask for things in entirely the wrong way, and things which are not reasonable.) Wouldn't you know it? They always seem to be looking when we are underperforming and going through a low, probably because one mood rides the coat-tails of another, and the word on the street was that we were the wonder employee, which is no longer true by the time they take a look. And why didn't they look when we were doing great? We didn't think to ask them to or didn't want to be a bother and didn't think we were really all that wicked. Do you have a rapid cycling type of bi polar? (this is my curse by the way...) It sounds as though you might...perhaps you are walking in your employers door on a high because (YAY!!) you got a job, and then your mood dips soon (as those of rapid cyclers do) and next to who you appeared to be, you're not so dang impressive now...they had high hopes when you were high. The contrast is unflattering. I don't know if it helps to consider this, but just a suggestion, sometimes being aware of the starkness of the contrast between one state and another helps to make one think twice before flying into a manic frenzy and then dipping into a chasm of sorrow (at least quite so obviously to those around). I make a very conscious effort these days (keep your fingers crossed for me that it will soon pay off) to simmer down a little even when I know I am the greatest and can do anything, so that onlookers merely pick up a bit of cheer and good vibes, and alternately come off maybe a bit pensive and quiet at another time when really I hate the world, wanna die alone, and couldn't give a hoot about this stupid job cuz what's the point, so that people merely think I'm a bit quiet and maybe sad(ish) today, rather than lazy and underperforming. Sorry, I tend to go on at length...my point being try to become very conscious of what exactly it is that you're doing and what mental state you are in at the start of, and then later on into your jobs and you may become a pro at minimizing the huge gaps between your states so that they don't pop out in your employers face at the wrong moments (ie when they are watching real close.) I think honing this skill will increase the likelihood that you will retain a job, and just remember, when you are in your deepest,blackest state, just drag your behind around, and go through the motions. It will pass. It has to. That's what BI polar means (up down up ad nauseum) and you don't want to get canned or be stuck cleaning up the mess you made or let happen all around your workplace because you succumbed to the whims of this stupid STUPID disease when you didn't really know how to give a crap. (Can't help with promotions though, sorry, I'd make more scratch if I had a clue how to value/sell myself, but keeping the job's a pretty nifty start no?)

(ps for what it's worth, you're not alone...I hear there are millions of us. Cool. Secret society of sometimes oddballs. Join the club so we can all feel alone together even though we aren't.)

Written by Clyde 211 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I am sure it probably doesnt help, but I dont know for sure if it would be because of your bipolar issues...what do you think?

Best,

Clyde


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