Avatar Posted by Daniella1 486 days ago (Question)
Im in a tricky situation which I can't believe I am in.

Me and partner have been together since we were 13 ( I know young). We have had few ups and downs along the way. But we thought we knew we wanted each other so have saved for a deposit and got our 1st house in October.

My partner has had a tough time in his job and has been very down.He has been very distant but I thought this was all to do with the job. However, he has said although thats part of it he feels we have rushed too much! He isn't quite sure how we got here and is not sure this is what he wants. He says he knows he loves me but feels this is not fair on me. We have not yet broken up and he says he doesn't know if breaking up is what he wants either.

I don't know what to say or do. I realise we have been together since a young age and committing is scary but if we love each other then surely thats what matters?




Answers


bella
486 days ago
Hi Daniella1 - how old are both of you now? First of all - neither one of you should make a decision about the relationship, until both are thinking logically. Its hard to tell at this point, whether your partner's just down from job stress or if in fact he's having 2nd thoughts about the relationship.

Since you met at 13, there's so many changes and growth which happens as you both became adults. Your priorities, even your thinking has probably changed a lot. As growth happens, its common for feelings to change. Since he's not sure what he wants, I don't think this should be forced.

Maybe speaking with a relationship therapist would be a good idea. Most religious organizations, have counseling for couples - where they discuss what they have in common...such as finances, expectations of sex, discussion of kids/no kids. I know this must be upsetting and hopefully this will work out.
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Daniella1
482 days ago
Thanks for reply. We are 25.

Still no progress so bit of waiting game!
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