Avatar Posted by jay91 86 days ago (Question)
hey,

okay this is my first time on here.im struggling with one of my best friends.im scared about her.shes 18 and about to go in to college.well for almost a year shes been struggling a lot with her life.like everything was going okay for her.i mean she wasnt her best but she was getting by but when i went to portugal this summer.i feel thats when everything happened.she became really distant.more distant then she was before.i came back to seeing a huge cut on her arm.she says she got hurt in school but i dont buy her story one bit.her story doesnt even make sense.im finding out from her other friends that shes been crying a lot.for four days straight she cried.shes also become suicidal.i confronted her about this issue and i always do.she claims that she is not going to because of her family and friends but i dont know.i told her to go speak to a professional and she says that she will around october.im stuck. i dont know how to help her.i know i cant fix her problems but i dont know what to say to her at all.i think shes losing it.a lot of her worries, her actions, the things she says dont make sense.any help?

thanks.


Answers

Written by looking4nanswer 86 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I know it feels likeyou can't really do anything to help her but what you are doing right now is one of the best things you can. Just being there for her can make a big difference. what you can do is tell her that you are always there for her no matter what, let her know that your worried about her and will do anything you can to help her.

I'm sure knowing that she is like this is making things hard for you, but dont tell her that because it can make things worse. personaly I have helped many friends with the same and similar problems, if you would like to i'll give you my email its mhsdancingqueen@gmail.com. If you need more help I will do the best I can. By the way I'm Jennifer and I just graduated Highschool so I totaly know the problems that she maybe going thro I'm here if you need more help...good luck

Written by Edahn 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Be a good friend (caring, sharing, and having fun) and make sure she gets into therapy. The sooner the better. If she's open to going earlier, maybe you could accompany her on her first trip for moral support.

Written by jay91 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

thanks im trying really hard to help her but its she just keeps pushing me away.

Written by Edahn 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Maybe she just needs a friend to hang out with and not talk about "issues" right now. Try it.

Written by jay91 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

yeah i had thought the same thing to but when we do hang out for fun shes very quiet.we play video games and stuff and ill see a laugh or two for awhile but then she gets really distant.

Written by Edahn 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I think that's fine. Just let her be that way and just keep her company. You don't have to discuss her being distant or try and make her closer. Just be there, playing video games, whatever. Sometimes people feel distant and just need to see that it's okay if they're distant and that it's just not the biggest deal.

Written by jay91 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Okay i understand ill try that.

Written by katrineme7 85 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

She may have started using drugs?

Written by jay91 84 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

no its not possible she is using drugs. shes not that type of person.

Written by depressedforever 83 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I was just like your friend when I got depressed i self harmed and got very distant with my friends. I got distant because I was afraid they would judge me even if they said they wouldnt.I thought it was embarrassing to talk about because they wouldnt understand how I felt. The best thing you can do is to keep letting her know your there for her because even when I didnt want to talk to my friends about it knowing they were there gave me a little comfort. No matter how distant she becomes never give up on her it's the worst thing you could do.

Written by Clyde 79 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

She just seems depressed. Be her friend by doing what Edahn said. Stay around her, talk to her about regular stuff. Let her know that if she wants to talk to you about anything, you will be there.

Remind her of her appointment in October when it comes up and try to make sure she goes--but dont force her.

Best,

Clyde


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