I'm sixteen and I have a pretty pathetic life. I have absolutely no friends due to a fight I had with a popular girl at school. I've been lonely and friendless for about a year now. My parents don't understand why I'm unwilling to do anything around the house or even get out of bed. My parents make fun of the fact that I have no friends, everyday I'm being mentally abused. I'm not good at anything, and I feel as though I'm a jinx. I feel as though I'm the reason my parents have fights or I'm the reason everyone is upset; because it always leads back to me. I do think that if I disappeared everyone would have an easier life. I'm very depressed and think about killing myself everyday. The only reason I haven't m killed myself yet is because I'm afraid of pain. So I'm trying this new type of method where I'm starving myself to death.

I'm probably just some joke to God. And I'm sorry I've let him down.

Even though I have dreams I feel as though I can't pursue them. Plus I'm not very good looking, so its not like I'm going to get married or even have children. I have nothing to look forward too in the future. So I mind as well end it now right?


Answers


bella
1862 days ago
Hi,

I want you to know that suicide is NEVER a solution to a problem. I know you're feeling very sad but your life won't always be like this - you need to believe that. I also want you to look at another question here and read how devastating suicide is for family members. Here is the link:

http://answers.psychcentral.com/user/view/published/login/zanzivar

There's no doubt that it's hard being a teenager sometimes and it stinks when you're having problems with kids a school. I know it's very maddening when it seems like the popular girl has all the control and when she's ticked she turns everyone else against that person. I've seen it happen at my daughter's school. There's a good book called "QUEEN Bees and Wanna Bees" and it's discusses the hierarchy of teenage relationships and the dynamics that go on between the various types of personalities(cool vs unpopular people) You know what I've noticed is that the majority of popular people are also MEAN people.

If you have been depressed for several months or more, then I think you need to go to the doctor and get help. You also need to tell someone who is understanding in your family how you're feeling. The most important thing to remember is you should never give up. Regarding eating - you can't starve yourself. This will just make you more SAD because your brain is the first thing to suffer. It's also sounds like you have low self esteem. Did you know most models don't look any where near as beautiful with out makeup and hair. Did you know you will change alot and many teens go through an awkward 'ugly duckling stage'. Also more important than outward beauty is inward beauty and that's what's important. If you take care of yourself with eating healthy and exercise then you'll feel better emotionally and look better physically.

You are not a joke from God and there is a reason you're here and you may not know it yet. There is a good website for people who are suicidal:

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

The important thing to remember is you don't have to listen to your negative thoughts. All you need to do is be patient for them to go away and treat yourself kindly.

This is what you need to do:

1.Tell a trusted family member and make them understand this is serious.

2. Go to your family doctor and get into some counselling.

3. Be proactive in your own care meaning eat healthy, exercise regularly and get out of the house and have some fun.

4 Learn how to take deep breaths and relax while thinking postively.

5. Be patient with yourself and know things will change.

6. Try not to listen to your negative thoughts.

7. Learn to be assertive and increase your self esteem.

You don't know the future so you can't assume you'll never marry or have children or fulfill your dreams - this is just the depression talking.

8. Try to motivate yourself even if you don't feel like - if you force yourself then you will gradually feel better.

This is just a bad stage you're going through and it won't last forever - you just need help that's all. I hope you will feel better soon and I'm counting on you to keep yourself SAFE. Hugs, Bella :)



LonelySuicidalTeen
1862 days ago
I have absolutely no family and my parents always say the biggest mistake of their lives was having me, or that they can't wait till I'm of age so I can get out of their lives.

But I will try to think positively and follow what you've said.

Thanks for the words ^_^



bella
1862 days ago
I'm a mom and that makes me feel sad to hear that. No child deserves to be told that and I don't want you to believe them. They obviously have big problems and don't like their lives. Do you have siblings or any aunt or uncle. When you go back to school perhaps you can talk to the school counsellor or are there teen health centres in your area?

For a while here we had a young 12 yr old girl who would post here ever 5 days with problems she was having and now she feels better. We don't mind listening and giving advice if you would like to write us again. You are 16 and you can learn to depend on yourself. People have overcame terrible adversity and still managed to be successful members of society. Try to do your best to get along and hopefully when you're 18, you can move out. I want you to learn to be strong. You don't absolutely need them to be strong - it can come from you, so don't give up. There are many people who care about you even if you don't realize it.



LonelySuicidalTeen
1862 days ago
I do have an aunt and uncle but they live in another country, they wouldn't understand.

this is starting to make me feel better, I'll be sure to come back with any other problems. thank you so much bellaacutie!



bella
1861 days ago
You're very welcome to share your feelings anytime. You can work on making yourself very strong regardless of what goes on around you. I'm glad you're feeling a little better. It really helps talking about your feelings. You can triumph over this and have a good life despite your parents lack of support. Hugs Bella



Clyde
1860 days ago
Yes, it is important to have others to talk to for sure. If you dont feel that you can do that here, you can also do it at www.psychcentral.com, where you can join our forums and discuss with others there, or of course, you can stay here and discuss things as well.

Whatever happens, please dont commit suicide. You really are worth living for.

Best,

Clyde