I need to know what is going on with me. I am 17 and I am incapable of forming deep emotional connections with most anyone I know, the ones I have have taken years to form, and still take a lot of work and patience on my friend's part. I am literally terrified of letting myself be vulnerable around people, especially my parents who as of now know very little of my personal life. I tend to create an outside personality and appearance that will mask what I really feel to some extent. In addition, if I find that someone is getting close to me or a relationship is moving to a stage where real emo Read More »
I am a college freshman *. So, I still live at home. Soon after high school, my depression went screwy and I formed some form of anxiety. Since then, I have had 7 or 8 anxiety attacks and each one is worse than the one before it. I havn't had an attack in about 2 weeks. But, I have a perminate "butterfly" feeling in my stomach. I hate it. I am terrified about another attack. But, my worst fear of all is completely going off the deep under and having to go to inpatient treatment/a hospital to admit myself. I am doing great and good grades. I have lost interest in all or at least most of the ac Read More »

When I was about 6 my parents got a divorce because my mom was using heroin. She was on and off until I was probably 10. Im 15 now and live with my dad. We lived with my grandparents for 7 years until my dad met a woman online. We didn't know her long and they bought a house together. We moved in and ever since I have been depressed. I feel like I still blame my mom because of it all the time. My stepmom makes everything so horrible. My family even sees it and tries to tell my dad but he doesn't want to hear it. He won't do anything because they use each other. He needs her right now and he d Read More »
I just turned 21 and I have no clue what to do with my life. All througout high school I had one goal in mind and that was to be a session musician. In the years since graduating I've changed quite a bit. I still love to play and write music but I heard a quote that sort of changed the way I see myself. It said: "An expert is someone who knows more and more about less and less." I think it's true. Living and breathing music 24/7 is great but I've been feeling very restless and now I've developed a strange habit that I don't really understand and I'm hoping to get a bit of insight on it.

I Read More »
Hi everyone, thank you for taking the time to read my question..
Ive grown up in a pretty dysfunctional life but its only now i really see it..
my parents divorced when i was 2, both are major alcoholics.
When i was 7 both of my brothers sexually abused me on numerous occasions both together and separately.. it eventually stopped when mum got suspicious and asked me.. but i was too young lied to mum and said that nothing happened because i was so embarrassed and ashamed..

whilst growing up, i saw a lot of bad things happen due to alcohol such as, my brother trying to hang himself, my da Read More »
I'm a fairly normal person, I'm friendly and kind, I treat people with respect. My entire life I could never figure out what makes people not care about me. I've been battling depression for the past 7-8 years. I've learned how to control my thoughts before the spiral out of control. I know when I'm just taking things way out of proportion. But I know this isn't a thought that is out of control.

From an early age I had friends who made me feel unimportant. I'd be lucky if more than 10 people would show up to a birthday party. I was always the third wheel in any situation. Even my extended Read More »
Hi, I've been on antidepressants for nearly 4 months, my doctor doesn't think I need them but the other doctor changed me from 10mg to 20mg. Is it more than depression? I cannot get more than 4/5 hours sleep at night, which means I'm tired all day, I scratch my head til it bleeds, I pull my hair out, I'm generally angry and unhappy but the odd time I go overly happy for no reason, I hear voices in my head putting me down to the point where I shout and swear out loud for them to shut up, I'm on a constant downer to the point where I'm looking for people worse off than me, and I feel guilty kno Read More »
Hi I have a dad that yells and my family cant take it and I am scared because of it.
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I just moved to Tennessee roughly 3 weeks ago. I'm coming from a town of 5,000 people - my high school class being 120 people. My new school is much larger - my class is around 500 people. I'm coming in as a senior and I don't deal with change well. I also don't like being around a lot of people. I've pretty much taken care of the most nerve-wracking parts of the school day. I have study hall in the library and eat lunch in the hall outside the band room. But I'm still really anxious both before and during school.

This whole move has been really hard to get through. I can't continu Read More »
I have been having severe depression for over 30 years now and don't think I can go on. My wife had an affair back then that started this and I have never been able to accept it. I still think about her everyday and cry over the loss of her and of all the terrible things she did and said to me. I loved her more than anything in the world and never ever expected this and it devastated me. I tried to commit suicide twice shortly after I found out this was going on but failed. Since then I have been seeing psychiatrists and psychologists. I have been hospitalized to many to times to count, somet Read More »