Avatar Posted by asdfjkl123456 47 days ago (Question)
I have been having so many issues with little things. "Many" in a sense that I often take notice of the small and petty things (i.e. friends did not wait for me when they all went out to grab a bite, someone did not notice when I said hi, people not replying to what I am asking, saying, or telling them... etc). These kind of things that can be easily "let go" and I often do, but sometimes it's just kinda weird how some small things greatly affect my emotions, as well as my behavior throughout the day...

It is a fact that some people do have other things in their head that we don't often know as it is privately theirs. We sometimes forget these as we encounter these people and often times it leads to a misunderstanding, a confusion if you may, that definitely makes my day bad. Sometimes I felt very ego-centric but I try to cope with this by letting others a chance to talk and to listen to them intently. But when I do, I often end up being awkwardly quiet, and at times, not doing anything at all. Most of the time we understand why we don't do things basically because it is inappropriate or impolite to, like when we ask for additional service in restaurant, when we ask tissue at the fastfood counter. I am well-versed to these kinds of things and I am amazed at how people react to this as they say that it takes a lot of courage (even though it is quite easy to do) to even ask of others' time and effort. Surely we do find that asking can be sometimes embarrassing but we try, as much as we could, be grateful to these little things that people do for us, I know this because I have been doing it for quite some time now.

The point being that at times I can't take my thoughts out of some silly little thing that it bothers me for quite a while, which rather disturbing as I believe that we try to make our times worthwhile and rationalize facts through certain justifications that we do every now and then. But when it comes to these little things, I can't help but be so oversensitive, even if others would often think that asking favors from other people would be insensitive of their well-being. I just can't seem to find the explanation between that disconnect.

Sometimes, I often blame my upbringing for this but there is no one to blame at all seeing that everything is indeed, not harming anyone of any sort. It's just that I feel disturbed about it, and become unmotivated, bothered, and at worse times, depressed. It's just unfair for my well-being if this keeps up...

What can you say about this?


Answers

Written by bellacutie 47 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I find that when people are young they get upset about petty things, more than when you're older and have more life experiences. Some people never learn how to deal with stresses in life. I think you answered alot of your own concerns. You may just be a little sensitive but at the same time you also seem to have strong opinions about how things should be - so when things don't happen according to plan it stresses you out.

I'm a sensitive person too and sometimes over analyze things and second guess myself. When I was younger it was a self confidence issue but it improved as I got older. When it comes to petty things I just ask myself "is this worth worrying about" or "do I want to allow this to affect my mood". I also like the famous saying "don't sweat the small stuff" and "will this matter 10yrs from now?"

Also we need to remember things don't always go according plan and there will be bumps in the road of life. You need to reserve your mental energy for the serious issues not the smaller ones. I hope this helps, Bella :)

Written by Clyde 45 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

People sometimes have problems dealing with stressors. You appear to be very sensitive and of course, things do bother you.

How about learning relaxation techniques--such things as breathing, counting to 10 before answering--that kind of thing?

Best,

Clyde


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