Avatar Posted by Hopper092 109 days ago (Question)
I really need some help here. My therpist said i have PTSD due to a series of traumatic events that has happend over the past year. I will not say what happend, but my symptoms are getting bad and i cant wait till next week to see my therapist to talk to him.
The problem is, I care way too much about what other people think of me. Its consuming me, to where i cant even go out to the grocery store and in school i feel extremely uncomfortable. I feel other people are talking about me and i feel they can hear what im thinking and they all know what has happend to me, which is very embarrassing and i dont want anyone to know. My parents just think im delusional. This has been going on for a while, and new things are happening. Im getting very depressed, and every thing that used to interest me doesnt. My memory is slowly getting worse and i feel if i dont keep reminding myself of things i will forget them completly. I just feel a sense of hopelessness for the future and dont really care what happens to me.
The most recent thing problem im having is im finding my self, at night when im alone, without realizing, talking to myself, but its not me who im talking to, its other people who arent there. My mom, dad, therpist, just people who are close to me. I feel uncomfortable with total silence at night and i know that they arent there, but i feel they are and i feel if i dont talk it will be awkard. The only things i talk about is my problems and i thnk the only reason why i do this is because i will forget them and no one will be able to help me if i cant tell them whats wrong. this is where my anxiety builds up with extreme confusion, and im not even sure what im confused about. i start having panic attacks and its really freaking me out i just would like a second opinion. i know you guys cannot diagnose me with anything, but i just want to know if PTSD is what im experiancing, or if these symptoms could be from anything else?


Answers

Written by Edahn 109 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I don't really know about PTSD, but here's my assessment:

It sounds like you've lost Trust. Trust is a feeling of safety. If you don't feel safe anywhere, there is no opportunity for you to relax and connect with others, and you can end up becoming lonely during that time. That can leave you feeling depressed.

The talking to other people that are not around -- there are some depressions that carry psychotic features. That doesn't mean you're going to hurt someone, but just that you might find yourself mildly hallucinating, as if other people were there. Don't freak out, though. It's okay. It'll pass when you make a few adjustment and when a little time goes by. It's not a permanent thing. It's important that you realize that and understand what I'm saying, and I know you do.

What I'd suggest is, obviously, bringing this all up with your therapist. He may refer you to a psychiatrist for the time being to give you a little more time to process what happened and regain the Trust that seems (to me at least) to have been temporarily hidden by your fears. He might also give you some techniques to help you calm yourself.

In the meantime, you can try doing some other stuff that will help you calm your nerves. You might consider sleeping with your parents or someone else in the room with whom you feel safe and protected. If you have a dog, maybe you can invite him into the room to sleep there. You can pick up some poetry or some books that you find beautiful. The feeling of beauty isn't that much different from that of safety (I've found). Getting exercise every day is also something I'd suggest, as it spending time with friends, even if it feels "off." Lastly, you can and should be gentle with your SELF. If you're out in public and notice that you're feeling nervous, be kind to yourself. Give yourself some encouragement and embrace yourself.

See what works best for you and stick with it.

~E.

Written by Clyde 109 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I definitely would bring this up with the therapist too. A lot of what you are doing can be construed as a self-coping mechanism--a way of reassuring yourself or making yourself feel better by reminding yourself of things or thinking about what others think of you.

Best,

Clyde

Written by katrineme7 109 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Hopper, I know the time between sessions can feel like forever. It sometimes seems like, the more you talk about, the more you have to say?

It may help if you write down some of your thoughts. When you do that, you no longer have to worry about remembering them. it's like saving them on paper. then, by the time you have your next appointment, some of what you wrote down will no longer seem that important to you, and other stuff will.

best, kat


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