Why does my ex husband's wife take every opportunity she can to try to make me look bad? One recent example: Minutes before my daughter's wedding ceremony, she tried to change the seating arrangement at the ceremony. The coordinator politely tried to resolve the ordeal, but that wasn't good enough. The 'wife' then comes to where the bridal party is lined up and procedes to create a scene with me, as to why she was changing the seats for the ceremony and why she and my ex needed to sit where my husband and I were sitting (in the first 2 seats/front row/brides side. I happened to be sitting when she got in my face. I tried to avoid confrontation by quietly stating that the coordinator's had taken care of the seating and everything was okay. I repeated that at least 2 times. But, she insisted on letting me know that 'they' had googled the seating arrangements the night before and the father was supposed to sit in the first seat and her next to him. Then she suggested that I sit next to my ex and she sit behind us in the second row, with my husband. I very assertively told her NO, we weren't changing anything, that my husband would be sitting next to me. Finally, (I'm still sitting) I told her that if they'd (she and my ex) paid attention at the rehearsal she would've known where they were to sit. She kept on, getting more upset and I repeated, that I was sorry they had not paid attention during rehearsal. She blew up on me, yelling...telling me that I put her down, like I ALWAYS do. (What?) She did this IN FRONT OF THE 1 of the coordinators, the bridesmaids, MY EX AND MY DAUGHTER/BRIDE. Finally, she was asked to leave us and take her seat. ***This isn't the first time that she has gone off on me, unprovoked and very irrational thinking... I want to know why she does this & why she tries to make ME look bad??


Answers


Chemar
914 days ago
Sounds to me like she is just one of those bossy people with some jealousy over ex syndrome thrown in.

Your ex should really have intervened and told her to stop. But then, she likely goes off on him whenever she cannot have things her way too!

I hope the rest of the wedding went off well. How sad that she spoiled it a bit for your daughter.

If I were you I would ignore her as much as possible and remain dignified whenever she tries to confront you.



captucker
914 days ago
The entire day was PERFECT and the reception went off without a hitch!! I managed to have a great time with LOTS of family and friends!! Had I been the type of person that she is, it would've been a bad scene. But THANK YOU for your response!! I'd like to know why he didn't stop her, as well.



bella
914 days ago
Do you think the ex wanted to make sure your ex (the father) got to sit in the 1st row? Did they want to take your seats or sit in the same row? I'm trying to figure out if jealousy was her motivation or she was feeling bad that the father of your daughter was in the 2nd row.

In any event, this should have been discussed way before and it should be your ex dealing with this, not her. If you're on a talking basis with your ex - can you ask him, was he bothered by being seated in the 2nd row or was this all her idea?



captucker
914 days ago
I'm sorry, I know it's a little confusing.. :) ...But, at rehearsal we were given our seat assignments and I was to sit in row 1, seat one on the brides side. Ex and his wife were to take seats 3 & 4 on row one, along with us. We all went through the rehearsal, the dinner following and nothing was said. She waited until the next day, right before the ceremony was to begin and was spotted putting her things down in my seats 1 & 2. When reminded their seats were 3 & 4, that's when she wanted to take it up with me. And my ex let her!!



bella
914 days ago
Thanks for explaining that all of you were to sit in the 1st row. I thought she was ticked because your daughters father was sitting behind your row. I agree she was nitpicking and made a mistake. It doesn't matter and they should have respected the seating arrangement. I would tell your ex to speak to you personally, rather than have his wife speak for them next time. The wedding was about your daughter and her husband, not her.