I am 24 years-old who's suffering from some severe anxiety over my health.
It all started when I did some research on my symptoms on the internet. A lot times, the results would have the word cancer and I would be totally paranoid. I would read the symptoms off the medical websites and I would be in dreadful fear. After that, I constantly non-stop thinking that something is severely wrong with my health. I started this around a year ago when I had pain in my body that doctors and health tests can't diagnose. I've seen a couple of different family physicians and also a couple of specialist doctors. All of them told me that I have nothing to be concerned about and there is nothing severe. Since I live in Canada, health care is free. I've changed family doctors 2 times over the past year and half to get more suggestions and answers. However, they all seems to say relatively the same things. I've been to the doctor's clinic once a week complaining the same issues, because he wouldn't send me to do tests. I've also cried a couple of times to my current doctor because I am seriously concerned. He told me I don't have cancer and that I am a young woman who is somewhat hypochondriac.
I've recently wanted to do a colonoscopy because I've been getting thinner stools. Researching on "thin stool" all I get was colon cancer. My family physician and the gastroenterologist both thinks that it's not necessary with the symptoms I have. They both just said that I have IBS or a sensitive stomach. However, I believe there's more than that. I used to have IBS since a long time ago, I know how it feels, and it's not the same. I've been getting thinner stools than before but it's true that sometimes, they are back to the normal size however, it's rare now because it's usually thinner. I told all my doctors and they all said that it's a myth because thin stool doesn't mean you have polyps or something severe is wrong with your colon. Someone with totally normal stool/bowel movement can have colon cancer. And my age, since I'm 24, they all said that it's really unlikely something is severely wrong with your colon.
However, I am not relief at all! I cannot stop thinking about it. I am fearful to go number 2 (sorry for being disgusting) because I'm afraid to see the size of the stool. I also have a loss of appetite because when I eat I feel pressure. I also constantly weight myself because my doctor told me that if there are something severely wrong with your colon you would be continue to loose weight and never gain weight. I have to admit that I did loose 10 lbs over the past 2 years. However, recently, the weight has gone back up 10 lbs but has also gone back down a few pounds at times. Whenever people tell me that I'm really skinny or how come you lost weight... I immediately feel dreadfully fearful and extremely depressed. I don't know, but I've also been experiencing fatigue! I get tired easily and feel sleepy most of the time. Sometimes, I would get foggy brains and just don't have energy. I'm scared.
I need a relief. I need help. I don't want to suffer. I would never be happy if I don't get this straight and doctors don't seem to give me a lot of help. What can I do? I've seen therapists before because I am depressed. Therapists think that I am also fearing over death due to seeing young people dying the past couple of years. However, they are really expensive and I can't afford for 10 sessions. Help! What can I do?
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