I don't remember when this started, I just remember thinking one day 'I have no emotions'.
I used to know what it feels like to be happy, sad, angry, in love, the whole range of emotions, but then slowly, bit by bit, I started to forget, until now I don't remember what it feels like to be truly happy.
It feels like there's this void in me, and I just have this train of thought that 'dictates' my emotions to me, like 'he hurt you, feel angry' or 'she gave you an amazing christmas present, feel happy', and I act these out, without actually feeling anything. I can feel body reactions, such as shock while watching a horror movie, but not the deep emotions. The degree of numbness varies, but I don't feel much even during my 'emotional' phases. I honestly don't know what to do, and it's scaring me except that I don't feel scared because I can't feel anything, but I know that I think I feel like a cold, heartless person, if that makes sense.


Answers


fierspirit
2074 days ago
this is apathy, I'm not sure the cause, but it can be assosiated with depression... have you been on anti depressents? It can do that too... I understand the same thing happened to me.



dhamal
1454 days ago
yeah the same exact thing happened to me. that's why i'm searching for an answer. anti-depressants and now complete apathy. have you found anything to help? i feel like this is how a serial killer is born. at least in a similar fashion.



nemesistherevenger
2073 days ago
No, I haven't taken anti-depressants. Some people have told me that it could just be puberty (I'm fourteen), but isn't that supposed to make you feel more emotional? I haven't seen anything that has shocked me or anything, and I don't think that I have apathy to a very high degree, I just don't feel enough to feel right, if that makes sense. It's not a good feeling.



stitlskin
2073 days ago
hi, nemesis, well even though you are worried about feeling emotionless I see something positive in your statement: you are worried, this means you are "feeling" worried. That is a start, a big one. maybe you should find outside help. Is this possible? Maybe, there is something bottled up inside you that doesn't permit your emotions to come out. When did it start? Why? What triggered it? Do you feel ok with yourself and how you perceive yourself? Ask yourself slowly these questions. And, yes i would get some help, because bottling up canmaybe lead you to a depression, or maybe not and it's something else. Yes, to me you do make alot of sense since you don't feel right. There must be someting there. Maybe, it has to do on how you perceive yourself, and your self esteem. If you don't regard yourself highly it can cause you this apathy maybe. Anyway, search for some help. At least you are interested and worried about yourself which is very positive, so start from there. My best wishes, stitls



Clyde
2069 days ago
Could you talk to your school counselor? It seems to me the best step to start on.

Best,

Clyde



baggypants101
1790 days ago
i feel the same way i know this was almost a year ago you started talking but if you get this comment i feel exactly the same way every word...