My gf has her problems, and alot of them have reflected upon how i am now. I Find myself worrying alot about what she is doing because of her past and present actions, I mean she goes to the bathroom, i find myself talking to her because i feel secure when werer talking, or if im worried shes going to be taking off again, I have always been faithful to her, i was never like this in the beginning, it all starterd when she started lieing constantly and then when she cheated on me, and left me for the other guy. Not tto mention several times of us getting back together and her Going back to Him, (until now, im just waiting for her to tell me, im sorry its over im with someone else *againn*
when she goes out with friends and shes out way past the time she says shes going to be, I call her to find out when shes going to be back, if shes not back in that time i call again, if i have to work and she doesnt come home i call her repeatedly trying to get her to come home. In some ways i know i am kind of controlling, but i feel i have given her so many chances, its kindof set in to tell her no to certain things, im sure i need to see a counselor for myself but does anyone have advice for me in the mean time? so i dont help in completely destroying the relationship before i can get professionel help and she gets hers.


Answers


andrew
3234 days ago
Hi

You probably won't like this, but I really do think you need to consider going your own ways.

It sounds like you might find it difficult to trust her, or people in general? Think about how you feel when she's out with her friends. Are you comfortable with that? Would you prefer it if she was with you instead?

Maybe you should have a chat with a counselor but in the meantime what you really need is some stability and security. Much as you love her and want to be with her, you simply aren't going to get that stability and security with her.

When you've had a break for a while and talked through your feelings with a counselor you'll probably see things a whole lot more clearly.

It's really really tough I know - it's what I'm doing right now - but if you want a relationship with this woman it is actually the only way you stand a chance of doing it.

The very best of luck with it,

Andrew



Jerr8507
3234 days ago
honestly, i do not feel comfortable when she is out with friends, i feel alot more better about it when she is at home with me, Or if we go out and do something together, Reason being she goes out with friends, shes Gone for more then a couple hours Or the time she says she will be back, Shes always Gone Till the next morning, and she doesnt even phone or anything saying shes going to be late, so its just gotten down to it where i start feeling alot of anxiety inside.



Clyde
3233 days ago
Sounds like neither of you are getting what you want in the relationship.

It could be true that you need to end it to find one better.

You are not getting any stable things going with her, that is for sure, and of course, you are worrying and wondering where she is, so that adds to the dilemma.

I would suggest taking care of yourself first and foremost, see a counselor, and take some time off at least from the relationship.

Best,

Clyde