To start off with my daughter has had a history of telling small lies that have not harmed anyone throughout her childhood. Things like, "my Mom has cancer', "I went on vacation", I have been on Multiple abroad trips". etc.
I had forgotten this pattern & have probably dismissed more than I should have.
Now she is 22 & over last 6-7 months in a new relationship. Moved in with him quickly & came to me in July and announced "I am pregnant". She was very happy- and I was stunned- however happy for her as well, as she had a previously lost a baby in 9/08 & I knew that she had probably replaced her guilt quickly by becoming pregnant.
Up to this point I had never met the boyfriend.They live over an hour away & there was always a reason they could not meet. Every attempt I made there was an excuse that he could not come; working, etc. Then in August they went on a vaction to an island that they had planned due to a friend getting married there.
She called my throughout her time away, and then asked if I would pay for wedding, they wanted to get married ob the beach. My first response was no, since I had not met him yet. However, I did pay for wedding. Upon their return after 3-4 days I told her I wanted to meet for dinner. Again another excuse.
I exploded and explained that this needed to happen.
I then placed a call to his work and left a message of whoI was & to call me. Is Mom lives in another state- I called her with same message. He never called back- however his Mom did.
One of the first things she said after we established who I was , she asked, "Oh you ARE alive?"
She reports her son had told her in June that my Husband & I,and her brother died in a traumatic event. I am unsure of the details she was told.
My daughter is very close to me & the family. Up until this day, she visited routinely & we talked every 2-3 days. She has attended all the family get-togethers as uxusal over last 6-7 months. I have bought baby things, maternity clothes , etc.
I have no idea why she would say these things. I know that she has said different "strange" lies to other boyfriends, the kind that seem like desperation things that would make them feel sorry for her & stay with her.
Her biological father & I divorced when she was 5 years old. He lives in same town, however has never showed up for a birthday, Christmas present or a card or much if any acknoledgement.
I am thinking that possibly she has abondoment issues?
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