I haven't had a 'clean' house in years. I don't have the energy or drive to get up and do anything. I've gained weight, stopped wearing makeup, stopped fixing my hair. I've just given up on everything. Am I too far gone to get ME back?


Answers


Chemar
1232 days ago
Hi

are you seeing a therapist? If not, it may be helpful for you to do so so that you can work on why this is happening and find ways to cope and get your life back.

It is *never* too late to make a fresh start :)



lydia115
1232 days ago
Yes, I have a therapist. I still find it difficult :(



bella
1232 days ago
Hi Lydia - I'm sorry you're feeling stuck with lack of motivation. What have you been diagnosed with?? There's a definite link to emotions - how we keep ourselves and houses organized. Even for myself I tend to put things off when I'm upset. Do you have a friend or loved one who could help you with the initial house cleaning?? If you have the money you can hire a professional organizer who could help you with what seems overwhelming ATM. If you have the money you can also join a weight loss club and get the okay from your doctor to start exercising.

With organizing and cleaning you can start small....maybe one room at a time. Get 3 bins or garbage bags - one is for things that you want to keep, the other is for giveaway and the last one is garbage. I give the clothes I don't want to charity. With closets its easier to take everything out and only hang things you'll wear.

With rooms, imagine if you take a picture and if it doesn't serve a decorating purpose or use, then store or get rid of it. With exercise, get the all clear from your doctor and then start walking. As far as hygiene goes its quite common for very depressed people to find difficulty maintaining hygiene. You just have to push yourself and do it. Think of the the water running off your body as clearing your mind. You can also think of your house that way - the clutter represents your mindset and as you clean your house, you're also helping to improve your environment.

What would you say is holding you back? I find those weight loss shows very inspiring - if they can do anyone can. As Chemar said its not too late to slowly get control of your life. Take it slow and steady...you can do it.



lydia115
1231 days ago
Bella, I have bipolar disorder, among other things. The exercise is difficult because I have arthritis, not only does the depression leave me constantly fatigued, so does the arthristis but it also causes pain that hinders. I don't have the money or anyone that can help. However, I've been trying to do some on a room at a time and find that the other rooms are overwhelming by the time I accomplish anything in that one room. I did manage to do the closets.....we had tornadoes that left many homeless and I took everything out of my closet that I could no longer wear. I was left with a jacket and 2 shirts :( Since I spend all day in loungewear/pajamas, all of my clothes that fit were in drawers. I donated the clothes and felt better about having done so. I've read that even housework is exercise if you go from being sedentary to doing some housework each day. So the housework would be beneficial in two ways. The doctors all tell me that I'm stuck with the fatigue because I have so many conditions that rob me of energy and then the medications for those conditions Zap the rest. Thanks for the info and taking the time to help, I really appreciate it.



bella
1231 days ago
Thanks for the reply Lydia. I'm sorry you have additional physical problems as well as bipolar disorder. Its sounds like you're in the house alot which means you're probably not getting even minimum sun exposure. Often we don't consume enough food that contains vitamin D and this can lead to a deficiency. Most adults are deficient in this vitamin and I recommend getting a blood test to check for this and other common fatigue related illnesses. I take vitamin D in liquid form and think its absorbed better this way. This vitamin also plays a role in cancer prevention and depression.

Do you have a YMCA or community recreation pool in your area. I highly recommend water aerobics and this is done in a group with people who also find regular exercise challenging. When I used to take my daughter for swimming lesson it was nice to see how the people all seemed to enjoy the exercise but also the social aspect. If you're not comfortable in a bathing suit, you can wear shorts and a shirt. I don't know if you belong to a church or again look into the YMCA for some hobby courses - something to get you out of the house and meeting women your age.



lydia115
1231 days ago
Bella,

I have agoraphobia, therefore groups scare the poop out of me. The water arobics has been suggested by my therapist too, I just don't feel comfortable in a group. I hate to admit, I haven't been to church in a couple of years. A drastic change from never missing a service. I felt so much better when I was in church, but I can't get my mind to understand that I would feel better if I went. I don't know, it's confusing. I did actually go to Sips-n-Strokes, a painting and drinking thing. I don't drink, but love to paint. I told my husband that the franchise here would close because that was the first thing in years that I enjoyed and actually even went to by myself, but most of the time I had a buddy or two along. Well, it closed at the end of the year 2010. I was so upset, still hoping someone will come along and open another one. Thanks for the information, it's nice to have someone listen and offer help, really nice.



bella
1231 days ago
You're welcome Lydia - would you be okay swimming by yourself or does that scare you? You can always exercise at home but I don't know your limitations - for example I have a treadmill and simple set of free weights and you can also buy inexpensive resistance bands. What kind of painting do you do?