I always thought it would be something to say to someone who thinks *too highly* of him/herself. But I have very low self-esteem, and I've heard it many times. So that's confusing. ???

Usually when it is said to me, the context is somewhat of a debate. I'll make a statement, someone else will disagree, I'll cite a source or something, and the response will be "get over yourself." I was never trying to be rude, only objective.

Even here on PC, in another area of the site, I said: When I hear a platitude such as "life isn't fair," and I'm already in a state of depression, it sometimes triggers a suicidal thought such as "if life isn't fair, I don't want it." And to that, someone said, "get over yourself."

If I'm interpreting the phrase correctly, it means, "don't have any self-esteem *at all.* If you assert yourself one little smidgen, you're getting too big for your britches, and you need to get over yourself."

Can anyone shed light? Thanks.


Answers


fastoldbiker
1708 days ago
The phrase can be used in several different contexts.

You can use it to say to someone who is too self indulgent.

You can also use it to say to someone who is over-opinionated and tries to enforce their opinion on you, perhaps arrogant.

It is usually used as a put-down, obviuosly. It does not mean that you should not have any self-esteem. Sometimes people use the phrase because they are unable to come back with an objective argument, or sometimes because they are ignorant.

I would say in one of the examples that you gave, you were showing self-pity, ie indulging youself.

Every person has the right to an opinion, and the right to voice that opinion. Don't take it to heart when you get a 'put-down'. Think about why they said it, what you were saying and the context in which it was used. Learn from it, but do not take it from the point of view that your opinion was shit. Perhaps the next time you may need to phrase your point differently to communicate, or express it with a different attitude.

However, in a different context, do not be self-indulgent!

Nothing wrong in being assertive either.

Don't be so critical of yourself, chill babe.



Edahn
1708 days ago
I think it's a more polite way of saying "shut up." I personally have never used it. It's dismissive and shows a lack of understanding, imo.



Clyde
1707 days ago
I dont think it means dont have no self-esteem at all, but it does mean (at least to me) to try not to be so self-criticizing or self-defeating.

Try and make yourself feel better--understand you are good and good things will come about because of it.

Best,

Clyde



denner
1707 days ago
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MustLoveHiddenValley
1706 days ago
It's all about context, like you said. If you cite a source and someone says that, my guess is that they probably mean "Yeah, you're smart, don't shove it in my face, I have brains, too, you know." When someone said that after you said you didn't want life anymore, they probably meant "you're not the only one who feels that way, you know" or "quit self-pitying yourself, there are more people who are worse off." I mean, it's a rude thing to say and shouldn't be said on this site, really. Keep your chin up. I mean, if that's all someone has to say to you, then they're not very clever, are they?



LovebirdsFlying
1703 days ago
I thank everyone for their helpful responses.