I'm not sure if it is due to my parents having such high expectations out of me, but it seems the slightest failure and I crumble to pieces. I make such an effort to do everything and make everyone happy and am such a perfectionist, all it takes is one person who is important to me to get disappointed in me or I let them down and I'm an emotional wreck. Why is this? Does it have to do with my parents or father? I always felt like I let my parents down all the time when I was younger and for a long time I could have cared less what anyone thought, or so I thought. Now that I'm older I have such high expectations and aspirations in life I feel like the slightest slip up totally breaks everything down I've worked so hard for.


Answers


bella
1413 days ago
You said when you were younger you let your parents down - in what way? If you're a perfectionist, you should try to ease up on yourself - otherwise you'll always feel disappointed because no one is perfect....we all make mistakes. I think we learn from mistakes and it's part of learning how to be a better person.

I don't know if this comes from you or the way you were raised - maybe both. It's great to have high expectations, as long as you're realistic and don't over do it. When things don't go as planned, try not to be too hard on yourself. When I feel disappointed I ask myself - will this really matter or be that important, 10 yrs from now? I don't know how your self esteem is - this could be related to that. Good luck in achieving your goals.



MountainLion
1413 days ago
Your Parents being hyper-critical does not help. Parents dont have all the answers and are human just like you. Thus they not perfect. So why should you be? Don't worry so much about letting others down. Worry such as that is related to Anxiety. Slow down, try some soothing music before bed time. From time we are going to let someone down, that is normal and should be expected. If someone comes down on you for letting them down, back away and give your self some space. They are in the wrong and should be matture about it.



Jasmine2010
1412 days ago
Welcome to the perfectionist club chriksteener1. It is one personality disorder that puts its roots out into your life and will finally choke you if you fail to recognise it. Now this may sound odd but one religious group does have some good understanding of this issue and although not cured I have improved a fair bit over the years

http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/

Don't go forking out any money, just take the online tests and read up on it from other sites.

Why can't I be perfect too? lmao love Jasmine



MountainLion
1411 days ago
@ Jasmine2010: If your in Q&A to push Religion, quietly of otherwise this the wrong fourm. It is OK to post what you learned from your faith, but posting Religious Links and Quoteing the Bible or other religious doucuments sould not be in a fourm such as this.