I feel like an ass. I don't know how to say anything right without writing it down. I am Mean. I don't want to be, but I am. I don't know why I just can't be nice all the time. I don't know why I complain and let things bother me.

I see how my horrible attitude is rubbing off on my 4 year old daughter and I hate it. I hate that she is a reflection of me and it is ugly.

I want to change, but I don't know how or where to even start. I am not unhappy. I am generally very happy and feel blessed with my daughter and husband. But I am driving him crazy. He does nothing right in my head.

I just hate the way I act sometimes. I hate the way I treat my family. They deserve better. I want to be better. I don't want to keep fighting with everyone. I don't want my daughter to grow up like me and that hurts.

What should I do?


Answers


bella
1137 days ago
Hi ladyjane - I'm sorry you feel so down on yourself. Have you always felt you're like this or is this something new?? Does it happen only when you're stressed out? You could get some anger management counseling but its also important to figure out where this comes from.

I find one simple thing to do is, think before I act and talk. Usually you can feel the stress and anger building therefore try not to react when you're feeling like this. Learning slow deep breathing exercises helps a great deal. Usually when a family is stressed out and not organized, this affects peoples moods.

Its also important to eat healthy, exercise helps a great deal and taking time for you to relax is important. When you feel the urge to say something mean, think first how you would feel if someone said this to you. It takes courage to admit you have this problem and I hope you can find a way you to improve. Here's a page from PC with some article on controlling anger and best of luck:

http://psychcentral.com/search/?Match=1&Terms=controlling+anger&x=0&y=0



ladyjane131
1137 days ago
Thank you Bella. I am also looking into PMDD because I have noticed that it seems to happen right before my cycle. I just don't want to be angry anymore. I will check that page out - thanks!



bella
1137 days ago
I agree if you have PMDD this could definitely be a cause and you should ask your family doctor about this. You can also google it - there's a lot of info out there. You should also keep a journal and track your moods so you can see a pattern and how it coincides with your menstrual cycle. You can also look into natural treatments too. Here's a another link to some info on PMDD:

http://psychcentral.com/search/?Match=1&Terms=premenstrual+dysphoric+disorder&x=30&y=8