Avatar Posted by mellmclean 527 days ago (Question)
I caught my man masturbating after he refused to have sex with me.When i confronted him about it, he told me he didn't care about my feelings towards our conversation.I feel like my self worth minimized drastically.I feel so many emotions right now.
Embarrassed,confused also very disgusted about this whole situation.I haven't talked to him now for a couple of days because i don't know what to say Anymore.Can you give me some advice Please!!


Answers

Written by Mattie58 526 days ago Rating: 1 | Rate Answer: + -

I think the question is what was going on in your relationship that led him to turn down sex with you. The masturbation is a side issue. Everybody's entitled to turn down sex if they're not in the mood, but it sounds as if this was a tense situation and you were maybe angry with each other. So that's the problem -- whether you were both angry or had other difficult emotions, and what that's about. Many men masturbate to soothe themselves -- women sometimes do too. And men in relationships masturbate without it meaning anything bad about the relationship. However, it sounds as if when you found him masturbating, it confirmed for you that he wasn't turning down sex just because he wasn't in the mood -- that it meant something about your relationship. It sounds to me as if both of you are feeling frustrated about not getting your emotional needs met. If you can manage to talk about what might be wrong without blaming, that's the most productive way. Best of luck to you.

Written by hiThere 525 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Yes, it sounds like something is bothering him emotionally. Just talk to him and find out, but don't necessarily bring up that particular event when you caught him. Good Luck!

Written by Clyde 525 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I definitely would talk to him again, and I would wonder as why he didnt want to have sex with you, but with himself. Communication is a great idea in sex and of course, it is great in just plain old every day life too.

Talk to him and see why he did this.

Best,

Clyde

Written by Bella123 521 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Well that's exactly what's going on with me and my bf and I think it's because he's not sexually attracted anymore. I hate talking to him about it because it's like I'm forcing him & he wont tell me the reason why he's acting different. So Good Luck!!

Written by Siren 511 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Maybe if you romanced him, like you could prepare his favorite meal with candles. Perhaps then he'd be ready to talk to you seeing how you went through so much trouble doing something just for him.


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