I have been engaged to the love of my life for the past 2 and a half years, it has been a roller coaster but I have been stead fast and very tolerant.. she periodically has gone to council ling during that time, she was the victim of sexual abuse as a child/girl, they diagnosed her with PS TD..to get to the point we have broken up and got back together many times during our 2+ year, my feelings are genuine but this broke me up...so I sought out advise on the net and stumbled across BPD, it was like OMG when I read some of the information, it is my opinion that she has mild BPD as well as PTSD, I forwarded the pfd file about it to her and she is of the opinion that it does apply to her.... my problem is that I love her so much and have tollerated alot of verbal abuse, accusations (regarding my job) ie: checking out sluts...and women, which is totally of base as I'am genuine about my feelings towards her. She wants me to be available to her but treats me as though I'm an embarassment, It really hurts, and my kids are also affected by her coming and going....so should I suck it and be a man (words she has used) and just let go of the feeling that I have for her? or make myself available to her becon call when it seems to suit her...it is hard because my feelings for her are so strong....
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Answers
Hi Lion:
Have you thought about the counseling stuff?
Best,
Clyde
Hi Roar,
BPD can indeed be a very strong mental illness.
Has she seen another counselor lately? This may help to completely diagnose her with it/and get you two together in the same room to discuss the feelings you are going through.
Basically, my friend, it is up to you. If your feelings for her are, as you say, so strong, you may want to stay with her. However, in the same vein, do not lose yourself just to be with others. You are as important as anyone else.
Best,
Clyde
Thanks Clyde,
I'am at the end of my rope, I'm really not sure if my heart can bare anymore of the torment I have endured, it has effected my relationship with family and friends(which she has labeled black so to say) and even the kids I'am raising...My heart says she is the one, but really I dont know that I should continue to support her ( physically, finanely or emotionally) anymore..it is tearing at me, I guess because she somewhat denies that I'am genuine.