Avatar Posted by beatricejean 27 days ago (Question)
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 6 months. He was a 27 year old virgin and I am a 23 year old with a reasonable ammount of experience.

My boyfriend and I had a reasonable "sex" life until now.
We slowly worked our way up to having sex and have done so on a few occasions now (however we never get to finish the job)
We smoke weed chronically and he always loses his errection during sex.

Things have been getting better in that department the more we practise and I really enjoy seeing him sated.

It took us a long time for him to be able to come during a blowjob and now I can pretty much make him come in minutes.
I must say that was a massive relief for me and I honestlty do believe the sex will get better as he loses his nerves.

I am very patient and love him very much so I do not mind.

Ok now to the latest problem (advice on any of this is appreciated but mostly this problem please)

When we first got together I was very open to him touching me and pleasuring me to also get me off while we experimented with his own new experiences ( I am his first kiss first touch ect ect)

Recently i aksed him to stop watching porn until we could get our sex life normal or at least existing. I personally noticed a large diference i.e his penis got much harder and bigger and he is able to hold onto his hard on a lot better.

Basically ever since we started getting things good for my boyfriend I have lost interest in sex.

He is now starting to enjoy his desires and I enjoy seeing him fulfilled and finally a happy man. I just have no desire for him to touch me...

*** I want my boyfriend to touch me but every time he does I have these intense feelings of anger and irritation that I pull away or push him away***

So far I have managed to cover my lack of interest with things like my period and feeling unwell but I am running out of excuses.

I don't know how to explain it to him without jeapoardising all the hard work and effort we have put in to him being able to let go of his anxiety and have sex.

I don't even know why I keep pushing him away.
I almost feel dirty and disgusting when he tries to touch me and every little awkward touch I find so irritating ( I never did before I would just guide him to do something different) Now I can't even guide him I just want him to stop.

Because of our inability to have proper sex yet we always got eachother off in other ways, it's been about 2 weeks since i let him touch me last (I get him off daily sometimes several times a day) He keeps asking me if I want to get off ect and I decline and offer my services to him instead.

Lately he has been getting sad when I say no but I can usually make him happy again if you know what I mean.

I'm just at a complete loss.

I am horny
I want him to touch me
I don't know why I feel so mad

Please help me

Also I am happy to answer any questions that will help me get an answer for this.

=(


Answers

Written by bellacutie 26 days ago Rating: 1 | Rate Answer: + -

I answered your other question. I think you both should stop smoking weed - maybe its affecting your sex drive. Also the anxiety you're feeling which you mentioned in the other question, could also be dampening your sex drive. Have you ever been sexually abused in the past? I think you should tell your doctor how you're feeling and have a physical with blood tests done. Do you think it's possible you're frustrated because he was having problems before and you always had to work hard to satisfy him?? I think it would be good to tell him how you feel. I also think you should focus alot on the cuddling and closeness together - take the pressure off of the need to have sex. You can also try deep breathing to relax you. Please consult with your doctor if you don't improve. Good luck,

Bella

Written by 8Akihiko 25 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

Hi, maybe I couldn’t understand your qwestion, so if it’s so ignore it.

It seems to me, you were practicaly a teacher for your boifriend and you were very motivated by this idea. I think you should have a partner rather then a student by your side, or do you prefere to be in charge, in controle of everything. He is more experienced now, more confident. Why is it turn off for you? If there is a mature understanding of each others feelings, it’s ok to let him take care of you.

Written by Clyde 25 days ago Rating: 0 | Rate Answer: + -

I definitely think stopping the weed will help.

It may just be that you are trying to teach him instead of work with him.

Best,

Clyde


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