I've been friends with this girl for 5 yrs. The first 1 yr I had not a single complaint with the friendship. We spoke in some form (IM, Text, Phone, Email) seemingly 50 times a day, so much so that when I went away for a 4 day trip she said to me "What am I going to do when you're gone?"
Some of the people she knew her whole life were in very volatile friendships with her and I took her side always because I didn't see any of the behavior the others were mentioning.
Background on the friend. Has lived in the same city her whole life. She had a strange relationship with her now divorced parents. Father wouldn't really pay any attention to her and her mom battled demons stemming from molestation from a family member. My friend put herself through College and Grad school and is very smart. She is also very alternative in her attire, way she carries herself, and manners are very poor. She has a huge tattoo and swears constantly.
She and others have mentioned that she was very popular despite being so 'edgy' and people even had a fan club for her in grade school.
Despite living in the same city for her whole life including college she has few long term friends. Her birthday parties she throws herself each year have a rotating cast of new people, coworkers who maybe feel they have to come and a few life long people she knows but they complain about her behind her back and never hear or see her through out the year.
So how did I make it 5 yrs? It's been tough. I have had my birthday forgotten every year but the first. She ignored me on a consistent basis and we barely spoke when not actually hanging out together. We however did hang out about once a week and she was fine once we were together but nailing down plans was always a huge effort and half the time she would break plans she made.
I've stuck around because I felt she needed something consistent in her life and I felt sorry for her childhood. I kinda felt like she had no unconditional love and I was going to try and give her that. I don't think I can anymore however. It's just getting worse and worse. She has a job that has people showering her with attention and she seems to not care as much about family or good friends. She can have 20k twitter followers and when she gets a flat tire have no one but me to call and trust me she does. But when I have a problem I can't even get a response in days if at all. When I confront her on being a more reliable friend to me as I am to her she makes fun of me for having 'talks' and having too many feelings.
She has not had a successful relationship with a guy in the entire 5 yrs I've known her. Every one I know that has known her for over 5 yrs says they just feel like she doesn't really care about them and they talk about her behind her back in that same terrible way I heard when I first met her and I discounted bc my experience was so different.
We are now not talking because I got mad at her for not being responsive to a yes no question I texted her for the whole day but she was responding to twitter followers. I have now not heard from her for 3 weeks despite trying to offer olive branches and falling on the sword.
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