My spouse has lied to me so many times. I have caught him to much. The first couple of times he was lying to me about smoking marajuna. (pardon my spelling). He says that he has since quit and I think that he has but always still wonder. Then I was with my kids renting movies when the lady at the till told me I had an over due movie, confused I asked her which movie, she said it was an adult movie. I had no idea he rented. I beleive that he watches alot of porn and I hate that, mostly because he hides it from me. If he was honest I wouldn't have such a problem. I recently found (penis rings) wich he says he uses to masturbate, but I don't know. He has lied so much before. Then wile I was out camping with our kids without him, we had gotten rained on and decided to come home to dry our things just for the night. My spouse wasn't home and didn't come home that night, he said that he was at a bachelor party (which I kind of beleive) but guess what we arnt going to the wedding. SURPRISE! I want to leave him but we have children, I have no job because I stay at home with the kids, and feel it is my responsibility to keep my family together. I don't trust him, but still love him. (GO FIGURE) But I really feel like I am in an abusive relationship. He lies I catch him he promises never to do it again and get help, goes to a therapist 3 times thinks he is fixed then the whole process starts over again. Ahhhhhhh Crazy making. I don't feel secure or good about myself any more. I basically don't feel safe. He wont hurt me it is just that I am always on guard. What do you think. P.S this time he wants to go to the therapist alone.
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