I have been with this guy for 7 months at first we met on the phone and we got alone great. When we started dating his jealousy started showing and everytime he would drink he would call me bitch whore slut, you want to sleep with multiple amount of men, your aater, he called me coo coo nut job when we fight. We have been fighting every day for 7 months and his mother hates me cause i took him away from him and his business so she causes more problems in our relationship we had time i would get so angry and hit him cause of all the name calling and his mom would threatens to have been beaten, when we dont argue we have great time and im happy he is very loving and never call me names. I feel that our relationship is down the drain and his mother causes problems because she talks bad about me to everyone cause when we fight he call his mom and leave to stay with her the next say i cry and apologise and he comes back its been going on for so long that i am so fucked up and depressed. He is very jealous if i talk to a guy or especially my ex husband we are not divorced yet but been friend for 10 yrs and we still talk when im hurting he is there for me to s upport me financially and mentally because he wants me back . I dont know what is wrong with me but I can't seem to want to let go of this guy im with. He doesnt have his liscence yet cause it was suspended so i would rent a car for him for 7 months and let him drive without one while i stayed home and was doing nothing he started giving me xanax and got addicted to them all i did is sleep in the day call my ex my mom about it. I feel he is only here for the car because when i tell him wont rent anymore he gets mad cause he says i do nothing for himn but stay home all day and sleep im so depressed lost my self esteem im so mentally fucked up but he always find a way to tell me he loves me and im the only one for him. We have been having money problem since i havent been working he was supporting me but my ex would also help me cause at times he didnt make enough. I am so down I feel depressed i want him to love me and care and defend me when his mom says shit about me, he gets easily angered yell at me all the time blames me for everything and its always my fault what ever i do today i told him i wouldnt let him drive the rental because i didnt want his mom in my car cause she threaten to beat me i told her not to make her work with him and he told me he wouldnt but then she ends up working again i feel hurt confused i just want him to stop yelling at me he walks away to go his mom calls for a ride backs his bag and leaves and always run after him sometime he stayes if i apologize if i dont he takes off back to his mom and leaves me crying at the apt the next day we are back together thenb he uses the car again. so today told him no more driving without liscenc u can pay and i will drive cause dont want his mon to go in my rental car and work for him im cause she insults me my parents and ex tell me to leave but he always find his ways to tell me something i want to hear and i stay but then the next day we fight again over and over again its insane, I asked him why he yells at me like this and not to other people just me and your mom he says cause you are more important which makes no sense, Im so messed out please someone help me i hate being hurt and left crying and being blamed for everything one time he asked me to get on my knees to apologise so he doesnt leave. he yells at me i forgive him when i say something wrong he doesnt and finds and excuse to leave and packs his bags and calls people for a ride then i convince himt o stay most time by lowering myself i am weak and i have no more seld esteem please someone help me im losing it im so depressed i cant live why if he says he loves me he yells so much at everyday he tells me all i do is bitch and i stay home and be depressed and do nothing im so fucked cause of all the mental abuse dont know how to get out i hate being alone and break ups and failures why does he say he love me sometime i think its only for the car and he says if i didnt want to be hear i wouldnt i would find another ride please help me im losing it. he started giving me xanax then roxy so i become fucked up and recently he has been talking more drugs then usual cause of stress at work and money problem and has been yelling alot more if u love someone why call them names how can u say u wanna marry me and be with me and how i ruined him for other women i am his i feel he tells me whatever so i dont leave so he gets the rental car since he cant do it and i do it for him all the time and no one else would risk it am i a fool i go out of my way for him and put my life in mess to help him and i suffer
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