My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years. We met a month after I had got out of an 8 month relationship and engagement to another guy. We got along great and were more like best friends that also had a physical connection. He ended up emotionally cheating on me with another girl, which nearly caused us the whole relationship. Our whole relationship has been about us battling to keep our exs out of the picture. His was seriously a stalker and he asked her many times to leave him alone and she would talk to his mom and sister just to get on my nerves. With my ex I will admit I was still talking to him ,probably in ways i shouldnt. One time I almost dumped my current boyfriend for my ex which is in the army and lives on the other side of the country. He always made me feel special when my current boyfriend made me feel unwanted.I ended up stopping our converstaions so i wouldnt lose my current relationship.
The first year was horrible, we were living with his mom and sister. I cleaned the house everyday and had no help from anyone Which caused me to be angry all the time.We ended up breaking up because his parents persuaded him to think i was the wrong girl for him.I was head over heels for him, i put him before everything. I completely dropped my ex and never thought about him. A couple months went by and he was acting so different.He used to tellme how much he wanted to marry me and be with me and now it was like i didnt mean anything to him. He broke up with me and it killed me he said he had been lying about marrying me and being with me. I begged for him to take me back and i was depressed for a month straight and then one day i had a wake up call. I'm better than this , i shouldnt let him control my life like this. I started living my life again and as soon as i did that he wanted me back. He promised that he was going to change this time and it took me three months later to take him back.
We have been back together for about two months and i have completely changed.. im not as loving, caring and our physical relationship has suffered a lot.I feel like he's doing better but isnt completely how i need him to be but ive completely become a evil bitch. I'm horrible to him, i yell and scream and tell him how he annoys me. After i do it i feel horrible but i never say sorry and its like i cant stop it from happening. I need to know whats causing all the yelling and the meaness. I lay awake at night and trully miss the old me. Did him telling me he didnt want me break my heart to the point we'll never be the same again? whats holding me back from becoming loving with him again?
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