I was raped 32 years ago. I hid from it.
I recently was triggered had a flashback.
In therapy for other abuse. Why did
this happen now? Explain trauma.
I recently was triggered had a flashback.
In therapy for other abuse. Why did
this happen now? Explain trauma.
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Answers
I believe this was because of an external or internal trigger which was subconscious. It could have been a word spoken, an expression, sound or even a smell which can trigger flashbacks. Also keep in mind you were in therapy and this can sometimes bring up insecurities which can cause flashback.
Therapy often brings up old issues we've put aside in our minds (for a variety of reasons). One of the points of most psychotherapy is to help people get at some of their emotions and emotional reactions and learn how to change the ones that are causing pain or other issues.
Sometimes therapy, in digging around in our emotions, readily brings up other events or emotions that wasn't specifically targeted.
As for trauma, it is a painful emotional experience, or shock, that creates substantial and often lasting damage to the psychological development and well-being of the individual.
Traumatic events are exceptional situations of helplessness and distress that a person experiences at first hand, witness or hears about, and which jeopardize the physical and/or psychological integrity of the individual or those close to him.
Typical traumatic events are natural calamities, violence, serious accidents, the death, injury, or serious illness of next of kin, and war-related stress.
Trauma can appear after a single event, a series of events, or a particularly upsetting period of life of a traumatic nature.
Trauma is a feeling or effect of helplessness, that one feels they cannot get out of or get rid of...it can also happen anytime, and can be triggered (PTSD).
That is a good thing about psychotherapy, to help us undercover what is going on that is bothering us. While we do not want to see a lot of what we see, it may help us heal later on.
The question now, with the rape of 32 years ago, are you going to do anything about it other than discuss it in therapy?
I wish you well and hope for peace and happiness for you...
Thank you for your answer. What options do I have other than discuss in therapy? I don't know what else to do.
Well, if you dont want to do a therapy session or therapy at all, perhaps talk to a minister or some kind of religious authority at your church if you are religious, or contact one of your closest friends (probably the closest friend) that you would trust with this information and share it with them.
The only things I could think about you doing solo would be journaling about it, perhaps write a letter about it and burn it or trash it--things like this.
I really wish you luck...
Your mind protects you the best way it knows how. It's completely normal to be overwhelmed by trauma and to hide from it for some time. The longer it's hidden, though, creates more difficulties as you try to understand it, process it, deal with it, etc. When your brain starts remembering traumas, it is trying to understand what happened. Since rape and abuse are violent crimes it takes the mind a while to sort through things. All victims feel guilt and shame, as if, they had control in the situation or if it were his/her fault the crime happened. Truth is . . . IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. You didn't do anything wrong. You were the victim. You were powerless over the perpetrator. To sum it all up, trauma becomes a memory of a horrible event. When you remember that horrible event, it is your brain trying to work through those emotions (i.e. anger, grief, disbelief, etc.). Flashbacks and fear are a part of dealing with traumatic crimes like rape. You'll eventually start feeling better as you allow yourself to acknowledge/feel the rage and hurt inside of you, especially if you are working with a trusted professional (i.e. counselor).
I'd suggest visiting the RAINN.org website for more information. They can refer you to free group counseling with others who have similar life experiences.