My boyfriend's father died 4 mth ago. He seems to be slowly moving through the grieving process. However, he is living with his mother now that his dad has died. she is not moving on; from what i see she is getting worse and she is also bringing her son down with her. This is becoming a problem in our relationship. I feel like I am dating her as everything we do depends on how his mother is feeling! What can I do to help our relationship as well as help his mother? I don't want to make him choose between me or his mother because that is not fair to him. Are there any books?
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Answers
Hi there Sarasan,
I can definitely understand your frustration about the whole thing.
One thing that complicates matters a bit more is that everyone grieves differently, and I would expect his mother to grieve the most (of course) over everyone because of whom died.
It may take some time more, but you may just have to let it play out a little more until the mother becomes more steady on her feet. I am sure it is a rough time for you all.
Perhaps the mother could spend time with family/in-laws/etc while the two of you went on a date or something so she is taken care of?
Best,
Clyde
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