I'm 15 years old. I've been been chatting with this guy on net for a long time, about 3 weeks..he's I'm my same school but i haven't seen nor met him....he really liked to chat with me n so he decided to meet me n take me on a date sometime later....the time came...he liked what he saw...but he REALLY didn't like me...mainly because i didn't speak much!!!...OMG!!! n now hes not even replying to me....i told him that i was sorry i couldn't me myself there...but he said he didn't have a prob with that....n later on i thought it must have really freaked him out to see a girl who was totally different from the way she chatted...n i asked him whether he was, n he replied that he was a little bit!!!....GOD!!!...i SOOO keep thinking about it...i really like him n i want to give it another chance...but he doesn't seem to want to...he has stopped greeting me by sending messages n all.....WHAT SHOULD I DO????...i think he really doesn't like him, but i just cant accept that!!!
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Answers
Hello Angel. When you are on the internet and chatting with someone it is anonymous, and you are able to communicate more openly with a person due to anonimity. Therefore if you still choose to chat with this person, and are still interested in seeing him in person again, then you need to work on building communication skills possibly over the internet to help you feel more comfortable in person when you see him at school. going out on a date where communication is available,(perhaps a restaurant, or movie) is a nice way to introduce yourself without feeling so threatened with having to talk to much. Honesty is also a very necessary objective, so that he does not feel slighted, or feel that you are uninterested. Just tell him that you are interested, but you are going to need some time to learn to communicate with him personally. Take care.
Perhaps you can give him a bit of time, or just send him a few emails, like Jean mentioned, that you would still like to remain friends, and perhaps you two could at least go to a concert or movie together--something that does not involve as much verbalization at first--in a way that helps you grow strength in your social situations with him.
I am sure it was easier to be social with him when you didnt have to see him face to face, and its just harder to interact...perhaps you both just need time to let the relationship grow?
Give it time? I know that isn't the answer you want to hear, but teen relationships often need more time for anything meaningful to take shape.
I'm sorry that your meeting wasn't good like you hoped. He isn't chatting at all with you? If that's so, there isn't much else you can do but move on, right?
Don't push it. Guys really don't like to be pushed, it makes it feel like their mom, you know? Maybe send him one last message, saying it's ok, maybe you can be friends later on again, and hope he will at least wave if he sees you at school. TC