im 17 soon to be 18 ive never had a father that cared about me all he did was beat my mom and me and came at me with a knife im loseing my home ive known my entire life and my gf broke up with me said i was too clingy but all i did wrong was want to spend too much time with her i cared for her bought her things just to see her smile did things with her i was scaerd to do because i knew she wanted to do it and one day we were sitting on the couch cuddleing with each other holding hads her head laying on my shoulder she looked up locked eyes with me and kissed me my first kiss and then the next day she just leaves me.. ive never felt this pain before... its crippleing i dont feel a need to wake up in the morning to move to breathe to eat to do anything but sit in one spot and wait for death to take its hold on me everything in my life that was ever good is gone i cant remember a time when i was happy for more then a few months at a time i dont know what to do what im going to do i just im stretched beyond my means and im breaking i dont know whats right anymore whats true whats false all i know is pain and it hurts and this is a new brand of pain thats killing me and i dont know how to fight this war by myself and im loseing please help me.. im so confused